To Whom it May Concern

If I ever got a letter that starts “To whom it may concern” I would punch the sender in the face. What do you mean “To whom it may concern”? You know exactly whom it concerns as you gave the letter to me. It’s the professional version of forgetting someone’s name whom you’ve met several different times. 


“I’m sorry, I don’t believe we’ve met”


We have met. We’ve met five times now. Your husband is the arrogant a-hole with too many shirt buttons undone over there laughing at his own jokes. You enjoy boat shoes, hummus and tapas and your eyelids are really shiny somehow. You know me. I know you. Now I have to decide between making myself look like I care more about knowing you than you care about knowing me by reminding you that we’ve met; or going along with your stupid game, still giving you the upper-hand because I know, you know, I know that we’ve met five times before. 


Anyway, “To whom it may concern” is offensive to me. It’s also the start of my story. Because I gave a “To whom it may concern” to my boss (an insult that was surely wasted). I’m quitting my job and I’m going all “Eat.Pray.Love.”, the poor person’s version, on 2013. This is my journey to find myself. And then beat the shit out of me (Hoodrat style, where have you been hiding and why, Narc!?)

 

I’m quitting my job, with no backup. I’m moving out of my apartment and staying “here and there.” I’m giving up gluten (not true). If you ask me in person, I’ll tell you that this blog is designed to help keep people informed on my “journey”, but as an honest* blogger, I have to disclose that like every other blogger I am doing this out of sheer narcissism.  



There will be cuss words, there will be sarcasm and there will be adventure as I explore the world and make 2013 the year of Danger. 



*I’m only honest when absolutely convenient to me.

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